Confession Wednesday

- I think I might  be going nuts, y'all. Cuz the vivid dreams just keep on coming. I don't know what changed, but every night there is some wack-ass stuff going on in my brain. Last night's dream involved going to a company lunch in a big theater where we ate steak and watched American Indians carve a guitar out of a giant log. And then I got fired for going to lunch instead of doing my work. And the usher who showed me to my seat rubbed my belly and asked how far along I was, then gave me an entire branch of a cherry blossom tree. Pretty sure I'm certifiable.

Me, every morning. Maybe it would be better if I didn't.

- Even in my fantasies, I require men to be taller/larger than me, otherwise I just can't get it up. This came up recently because T. Bob broke my heart by announcing that Mark Ruffalo is only 5'8". I find Mr. Ruffalo devastatingly attractive, but in my head, he was a big ol' man, like 6'3"-6'4". So now that I know he is shorter than me, I will have to find someone new to star in my pretend dalliances. T. Bob thinks this is hilarious, and now we have a game where we Google various celebrities' heights and discuss. For instance, did you know that Jonah Hill is only 5'7"? But Bill Murray is 6'2"? I was also sad to find out that while Jimmy Fallon is indeed taller than I am at 6', he's not the giant I thought he was (perhaps I confused him with Conan? IDK). I cannot have this situation going on, even in my dreams:

- I finally painted the downstairs bathroom (it's been on the to-do list for like six months), and now I realize it is the exact color of an elephant. I had this whole gray-and-purple look going in my head, but I haven't put any of the purple stuff in yet, and all I can think about when I'm in there now is Dumbo. Possibly a bad choice.

- Dresses are my favorite. You look "fancy," but it's so much easier than picking out a full outfit - I don't have to think about which sweater goes with my camisole and whether my pants are long enough to wear with my new shoes, etc. And it's so nice out, like almost 70 degrees! So I am wearing a dress with open-toed shoes to celebrate.  Dresses FTW!

What crazy shiz is going on in your life this week? Linking up with Vodka and Soda for Humpday Confessions!